Sunday, May 31, 2015


Well....I'm only slightly behind on my pregnancy updates.  Since we found out a bit later this time around than we did with Kensie, it's taken me a tad longer to get my tush in gear and do a belly picture.  So here you go!  My 16 week update....Even though I'm currently 18 weeks already.....CRAZY!

My little helper wasn't too thrilled that I made her stay inside

Any Cravings?  Oh yeah!  I want salsa!  Like ALL. THE. TIME!!!  I could drink it, and between you and me, I may have done just that last week. But it can't be just any salsa.  "Organic Valley" salsa has been my "go to" salsa to satisfy my cravings.  But who am I kidding.  I'm sure I'd guzzle down any salsa I could get my hands on.  I also want fresh fruit with pretty much every meal.  Mango's especially.  Mmmm I think I may go buy some mango salsa!

Maternity Clothes?  Pshhhhh yeah!  I've been in maternity clothes since I hit the 12 week mark.  Hellooooooo stretchy waste bands!  Oh how I've missed you! 

Movement?  Not yet.  I swear I felt the baby right around 13 weeks.  There were two nights in a row that I felt a slight "bump bump bump"  in my lower abdomen, but nothing since then.  Maybe it was just gas.....Sigh. :(

How are you feeling? Pretty good overall.  The sickness is getting better and only certain random smells set me off.  I still can't do any caffeine or I get sick, and I can't prepare chicken and then still want to eat it.  The weird thing is that my stomach is sensitive to certain sights.  I walked through the meat isle at Winco the other day and I immediately got sick when I looked at the raw meat.  That was weird, and something that didn't happen when I was pregnant with Kensie. 

Stretch marks? Puh!  I have so many stretch marks from Kensie that I wouldn't be able to tell if a new one popped up or not.

Best moment of the week? I have no idea!  My memory has been non-existent this pregnancy.  Like seriously!  Someone will tell me their name and I will immediately forget it.  This is new for me.  I have always had a really good memory so this has been an adjustment.  My husband's memory has always been...lets just say, not the best, and he has been reminding me of things.  So bizarre to have switched places with him in the memory department.

Sleep?  Sleep has gotten better this week. I've been really uncomfortable so I went around the house gathering spare pillows and now sleep has been glorious!  It only took 6 pillows!  The hubs' calls it my pillow fortress.

Miss anything? Not really.  But I haven't been as good about not eating the "forbidden" lunch meat this time around.  During my first trimester I really wanted sub sandwiches, for like every meal!  It's the only thing that sounded good so I broke the rule and had myself some Subway. Mmmm. Don't worry, it was only like 8 times.  LOL.  No seriously, don't worry.  I had them microwave the meat so no listeria for this girl!

Belly button in or out? I'm pretty sure my belly button has muscle memory from my last pregnancy?!  It's already starting to turn inside out.  It's a half inny, half outty.

Wedding rings on or off? On!  And fitting just fine at the moment!

Current mood?   Happy!  Although slightly annoyed.  Not for any reason in particular. I've just had a shorter fuse for annoyances lately.  Hopefully that will pass soon.

And......Since I've slacked on updates prior to 16 weeks (mainly because I can't remember anything) here is a peak at our 12 week ultrasound!!!  I think he/she has my nose!


Wednesday, May 20, 2015

So this happened....

Surprise!  We're expecting baby #2 October 28, 2015!

It's true what they say.  Things happen when they're supposed to! After the long and emotional journey we endured while trying to conceive Kensie, we recently decided that we were ready to start the journey for baby #2.  We figured it would take a while, so with Kensie turning two in March, the time felt right.   

I just knew that I was pregnant in early January.  I was convinced! So when day 60 of no "visitor" arrived, I took a pregnancy test.....But it was negative. Negative?!  I was shocked!  I honestly thought I was pregnant, but it was a true negative.  I wasn't pregnant.  My body was just body.  Fast forward to March.  Day 60 of no "visitor" rolled around again.  After last month's negative result I didn't suspect pregnancy at all.  Not one bit.  This is my normal.  I decided that I better call the doctor to figure out how to regulate my cycles if we were serious about trying for a second baby.  But I thought I should just take a test first to be sure.......

"Two pink lines?  Two pink lines?  Whaaaaaaat?!  Doesn't two pink lines mean positive?"  I ran upstairs to get the instruction insert for the tests.  "Maybe two pink lines on these tests mean it's negative?  I mean, I did buy them online, and they were pretty cheap. So maybe the results are backwards? I read through the instructions.....Nooooope!  Two pink lines means POSITIVE!!!
POSITIVE!!!??? But we weren't even "trying" yet.  We only just had the conversation that we were ready to start trying.  It was supposed to take us a long time and a lot of money at a fertility clinic!  Making babies doesn't come this easy to us.  There's no way that it's positive!"  Two more tests later.....All three were POSITIVE!  Shaking and crying with happiness and disbelief, I called my husband and asked him if he could come home for lunch.  I left all three tests on the bathroom counter and asked him if he could check the "leaky faucet" in the bathroom.  He walked in and froze immediately while staring at the counter.  "WHAT?!  Are you serious right now?!"  His eyes filled with water and his breathing became short and quick.  "But, wha, buuuuu.  Are you serious?  I can't believe this!"  We both started crying and hugging each other in disbelief.  

Cautiously optimistic, I took a pregnancy test twice a day for the next two days.  To my surprise, they were all coming back positive.  "Maybe this is actually happening!"  I called the doctor and they got me in within the week to do an ultrasound to see how far along the baby was and to check viability.  After doing the math and trying to figure out when this could have possibly happened, I figured I was only going to be about 4 weeks along with a due date around the end of November.  We probably wouldn't even get to hear a heartbeat at this visit.  We were prepared for anything and trying to prepare ourselves for disappointment.  

As soon as I could see the ultrasound on the screen I saw a little flicker.  "Gasp! That's a heart beating," I said.  "There's actually a baby in there!"  I immediately began to cry.  My husband grabbed my hand and leaned over and kissed me. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, whoosh.  We could hear the heart beating.  "Oh my gosh, that's our baby!" he said.  
It turns out that I was wrong about everything.  I AM for sure pregnant and I am further along than I thought.  The baby measured 8 weeks exactly at this appointment, with an official due date of November 2, 2015.  However, this little bug will be here on October 28th via c-section unless he/she decides to come earlier.  

Words can't describe how excited and blessed we feel!  We can't wait to meet this little munchkin and for Kensie to become a big sister!

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Just a mom?

A good friend of mine called me up the other day to ask if I'd be interested in joining her multi-level marketing business.  She was so excited about the potential income she could make while working from home.  While I politely declined to join, I listened to the excitement in her voice as she explained her new business venture. What caught my attention the most however, is when she said "I wanted something that would allow me to stay home with the kids while earning money so I can still feel like I am contributing, and not just be a mom".  The minute she said this, it was all I could think about.  Still, days later I'm pondering this statement.  So many mom's share this same sentiment, myself included.  Why do we think that raising our children isn't enough?  When did it become socially unacceptable to "just" be a mom?

I've been a stay at home mom for over two years now and periodically I still feel guilty for not contributing monetarily.  My husband and I have pretty traditional roles.  Sometimes I think we live in the 1940's.  He handles the outside chores, and I handle the inside.  He brings home the bacon and I cook it.  This is what works for us and we wouldn't have it any other way.  I have the best job in the world, and might I say, the hardest job I've ever had.  Raising kids isn't always a walk in the park.  Sometimes it's a full on sprint while trying to pull up your toddlers pants at the same time.  But it's SO rewarding!  I'm doing what I've always wanted to do, and what is the best for our family.  I'm a mom and a wife.  But why do I, and so many other stay at home mom's, still feel like sometimes it isn't enough? 

I'm not going to lie.  Before I became one, I was seriously delusional about what stay at home mom's do all day.  In my head, a typical day of my future life went something like this:

Wake up and feed the baby.  Sit and watch "The Price is Right" while I leisurely feed myself.  Take a shower and get myself primped while the baby is sleeping.  Clean the house.  Go grocery shopping.  Get in a workout.  Prepare dinner and have it on the table by the time the hubs comes home from work.  Clean up dinner and do dishes while husband plays with the baby.  Give the baby a bath and put her to bed.  Have several hours of "me" time to work on arts and crafts. 

See!?!  I was DELUSIONAL!! I thought all of that was possible to accomplish in one day! As do most people who haven't had the opportunity of being "just a mom".  The expectations we set for ourselves are ridiculous.   In reality, a day where both my child and myself are dressed in something other than pajamas, or an outfit resembling a hobo, is a win!  A day where I get a shower, is a win!  A day where I go to the bathroom by myself at least once, is a win! A day where we make it to the grocery store and dinner consists of something other than nuggets or hot dogs, is a win!

The truth is, every minute of every day is consumed by the tiny person tugging at our legs saying "mama, mama, mama"! After feeding, bathing, the war of wearing clothing, the war of brushing teeth, calming the meltdown about the Cheerio that fell on the floor, the battle of wills about nap time, the boo-boo kissing, searching for their missing favorite stuffed animal of the week, the snuggling, and maybe even a little learning time, there's no time, and no energy left.  Our days are spent taking care of this tiny person and molding them into a caring, smart, empathetic, and sincere member of society.  This is our job as mothers.  And it's the most important job there is.  My heart aches for people who don't have the luxury of being "just a mom".  So many women yearn for this opportunity but it's just not possible.  And on the flip side, many mom's recognize that they don't want to be a stay at home mom, and that's okay too.  Whatever our choice or situation is, we all have one thing in common.  We are moms.  And we shouldn't feel guilty for being "just" that. It IS important!  What we do IS important!  And I will never apologize to my children for "just" being their mom.

Monday, May 11, 2015

I'm Baaaaack!

Have you missed me?  I've missed you!  As you can imagine, having a toddler around hasn't left me much time to sit and blog very often.....Or ever.  Okay, that's not completely true.  I've had time at night, but I've chosen to work on my crafts sit on my rear and watch the boob tube.  It's been glorious!

I just realized that my last "blog," if you can even call it that, was about Kensie's first birthday!  Can you believe that she recently turned TWO?!?! Crazy!!! And even that entry, as well as the year prior, were only pictures.  No narrative.  So with that being said, I really want to get back into blogging again.  I want to get back to putting my thoughts, feelings, and opinions onto paper er the screen, and to keep family and friends updated on our lives.  Ya know, since we moved to Medford and you don't get to see our faces on a daily basis.  Oh yes, in case you didn't know, we moved to Medford last July.  No biggie. :) Something I would've blogged about had I not been so caught up in my crafts t.v. shows.  Anyways, getting back into blogging.......I sometimes feel that by spending all of my time with a two year old, I'm getting dumber by the day.  Like seriously! As she gets smarter, I can literally feel the knowledge being sucked out of my brain and into hers.  It's really amazing to watch how smart she's getting.  But as I watch her struggling to find the words to form a sentence, I've started noticing that I'm doing the same! So yes, this is my spring resolution.  To get my brain some exercise and start blogging again!  There, I said it!  It is out in the universe and I hope to follow through.  This is my intention but I'm not making any promises.

Confession:  Do you want the real truth of why I haven't blogged in over a year?.....I may have forgotten my password.  And I may have also forgotten the email in which this account is under.  And I may have tried so many combinations that I may have gotten locked out of my account.....A LOT!  Oops!